BAD BLOGGER

Holy hell, I really need to get better at this!

Life has been a little stressful lately, Anu is continuing to work crazy hours and I'm trying to fill my time with lots of sub jobs and studying for my content exams. The problem is that it's RIDICULOUSLY BORING to both sub AND study so I find myself wasting lots of time. I also have these lazy, lazy cats who are really good at convincing me to emulate them. Look at the lazy fatties:

So lazy. So fat.

Last night before I went to bed I was trying to think of something interesting I could post up here for you guys. Unfortunately I couldn't come up with anything, so here are some Haikus I wrote:

Tree Pollen

I feel degraded

Horrible green dust in air

Please don't rape my nose

RNA

No, I don't use you

Cells prefer "deoxy" you

Get a double strand.

Facebook

Desperation has

finally become OK

Remember high school?

Vacuums 

Are you kidding me?

Change the damn filter AGAIN?

I want a Roomba.

The point is that I can write a Haiku about anything as long as I know what it is. I'm not kidding. I write Haikus all the freaking time at work. I used to write them at Alfred Angelo, too. I'm told that some of them were found in strange places after I left. Boy I'm cool. I also used to draw squids, but that's not important right now. You give me a topic and I'll give you a Haiku in 5 minutes or less.

In other horrible boring news, I really need a new handbag. My old Kathy Van Zeeland is beginning to wear down on the handle seams and that just looks like crap. I'm going to need another big purse to replace it since the small ones just aren't cutting it for me anymore. Suggestions? I'm looking to not spend a fortune on it, either, since Anu and I are saving up for a new air conditioner and tankless water heater. House shit is expensive, y'all. Heed my words of wisdom.

In non sequitur news, I want to jump in a freezing cold pool of algae and salamander poo like WOAH. Summer is drawing ever nearer and I am having crazy Barton Springs jones. Jason, I don't know how you live with them since you're all the way up there in freezing cold cow and cheese land. Seriously, I hate being cold more than anything else in the world, but something about that moment when you jump in and your breath is literally shocked out of your body by how effing cold it is makes me all happy inside. I miss you Barton Springs, and I'll see you in late May probably.

I suppose that's all for now. I really am trying to be good about updating this blog. I'll get better.

Love and Kisses,

Daner